Sexpert Q&A: Laundry Doesn’t Make for Lust

Dear Yvonne,
I’m living with a boyfriend for the first time and we’re into dividing chores equally. I was wondering if you think that sorting dirty laundry with a significant other can begin to breakdown passionate feelings of excitement? Would you suggest keeping your intimate items like dirty underwear from the other to help prevent that?
—Cherlynn
Dear Cherlynn,
Seeing the other’s unsightly laundry is going to happen at some point. In the past, it has typically been the woman who has had to deal with dirty laundry, killing her passion first. One way to look at this: Gender equality. So increasing other efforts to maintain eroticism can be more of a team effort. Also, some people can actually get aroused by washing the sheets, for example, finding stains from the last time they had sex, or still being able to smell the other’s scent on their clothes. Plus, doing things together builds bonding.
Dr. Yvonne Kristín Fulbright is a sex educator, relationship expert, columnist and founder of Sexuality Source Inc. She is the author of several books including, “Touch Me There! A Hands-On Guide to Your Orgasmic Hot Spots.”
Tags: dirty, Dr. Yvonne Fulbright, eroticism, gender, intimacy, laundry, passion, scent, sex, underwear
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Okay, so what is the point of dividing the chores if you, both, end up doing them anyway? If you’re so freaked, then just have him do his laundry and you do yours. Or you could NOT scrutinize his clothes as you’re separating whites from colors. Just a thought.
With my last boyfriend.. I had to bribe him with sex just to get him to DO his laundry. It a plus for me, 1, sex, 2, he SMELLS better after the clothes are clean!
Cherlynn: My girlfriend recently moved in with me. She also had this same issue but seemed to get rid of it. Forget about sharing chores and all that other stuff above. The sight of the other working turns my girlfriend and I on. On the weekends we sometimes do not get lots of work done but we do get lots of workouts! No wonder I’ve lost 35 lbs in 4 months! Sounds like a good thing to me. Much worse things can and do wear down a relationship. I wouldn’t let sorting clothes be a deal killer. It’s only a chore. Even as adults we have to do them. I don’t worry about her seeing my undies and vice versa cuz what we do while we’re intimate makes seeing someones undies seem like childs play ; )
works for me to do the laundry together. while sorting it, the washer and dryer can be used to make love on while you wait for the clothes
If you have to ask a question like this you’re not mature enough to be living with a significant other.
Dear Yvonne,
My husband is returning home from Iraq in a few short weeks. When he comes home, it’s like a honeymoon all over again. It’s fantastic! But a few weeks later, we tend to get into the same old routine with the kids and the house work and work itself. How do we break this thought cycle and keep the fire burning wild like its his first night home?
-Amelia
My wife has a man friend who wears a rather strong cologne. The residual scent on her, her pillow, the sheets, clothing and elsewhere does, in fact, seem to return to her some sensual feelings. Intersting and I suppose logical. Maybe they should wash each other’s dirty underwear as a means of diminishing or moderating these residual virtual engagements and bring them to a more terrestrial relationship.
Dr. Yvonne, i would like to update me about health issues, mostly about sex. As of now i have some complications on my life. Given that time i expect you to atleast send me what iwant. Please reply me as soon as you read this email.
Looking foward to hear from you.
Have a good time.
ABEL