Dear Yvonne,
What are the dangers of oral sex without using a condom?
—Sissie

Dear Sissie,
As discussed in my first book, The Hot Guide to Safer Sex, unprotected oral sex is a high-risk sexual behavior. You can get sexually transmitted infections like gonorrhea, syphilis, chlamydia, or HIV, from performing oral sex on a man or woman. Another thing to keep in mind is that when someone has the common cold sore (a.k.a. oral herpes — HSV-1) and goes down on you, you could contract genital herpes, or HSV-2.

To protect yourself, use a dental dam, which is a rectangular latex barrier that is placed over the vulva (or anus) during cunnilingus (oral sex on a female), or a non-lubricated, non-spermicidal condom during fellatio (oral sex on a male). You can also use a sheet of non-microwavable Saran Wrap if a dental dam is not available, or cut a condom lengthwise for a square.

Dr. Yvonne Kristín Fulbright is a sex educator, relationship expert, columnist and founder of Sexuality Source Inc. She is the author of several books including, “Touch Me There! A Hands-On Guide to Your Orgasmic Hot Spots.”

Dear Yvonne,
My girlfriend and I have had sex a few times and it seems every time we do it missionary-style, the condom breaks. Is this common or is there some way to prevent this? Any help would be greatly appreciated.
-Marshall

Dear Marshall,
Condoms can break for any of the following reasons: They’re not being used correctly; they were manufactured improperly, they’re past their expiration date or were damaged after manufacture. In most cases, breakage is due to human error, especially incorrect use, like not leaving a half-inch of space to collect semen at the tip or unrolling a condom the wrong way. Given this is a regular occurrence, it’s likely that your condom breakage woes have more to do with the way this prophylactic is being put on versus any manufacturing problem. 

To correctly put a condom on, do the following after checking the expiration date:
1.   Make sure the condom is right side out.

2.   Pinch an inch at the tip, especially if you’re not using a reservoir-tip condom, so that the semen can be collected.

3.  If you’re uncircumcised, pull back the foreskin before unrolling the condom on.

4.  Smooth the condom over your shaft to get rid of any air bubbles that can cause your condom to break.

Dr. Yvonne Kristín Fulbright is a sex educator, relationship expert, columnist and founder of Sexuality Source Inc. She is the author of several books including, “Touch Me There! A Hands-On Guide to Your Orgasmic Hot Spots.”

Dear  Yvonne,

I have a question regarding an “issue” and I want to know if you can give me some advice. I am having trouble staying fully erect after I put a condom on. What are the reasons this keeps happening? I have tried different types of condoms and it still hasn’t worked.
                    – Jeb

Dear Jeb,
Many men have found themselves in your shoes. And while condoms can significantly reduce tactile stimulation, they’re often not the sole problem at hand. This reaction is usually a symptom of one. An erection can topple for physical reasons, for example, a change in rhythm and stimulation being ceased, to more psychological/emotional ones, like a male’s fear, guilt, stress, or anxiety over staying hard. The quality of the relationship and the couple’s experience together can also play into a man staying hard since comfortability is key in putting on a good show.

In solving your dilemma, first, raise the requirement for more friction-focused pleasure and make sure that your partner is still touching you and trying to turn you on with touches and kisses as the condom is going on. This could be especially effective as your lover actually puts the condom on you, for example, orally. Furthermore, flesh on flesh makes for a more ready stimulus, so take care to utilize the non-exposed hot zones to heighten your sensual pleasure.

Second, while you’ve experimented with different types of condoms, try using different sizes. A condom that is too small, for example, can result in blood flow issues and some discomfort, so be sure to use a size appropriate rubber on your member. 

Third, practice condom use while masturbating, as this can help you to feel more confident when you’re in the actual situation. Lastly, don’t be afraid to step away from having sex itself and simply reconnecting with your partner. Taking the focus off of sex can help you to feel more relaxed, taking pressure off of any need to stay up. 

Dr. Yvonne Kristín Fulbright is a sex educator, relationship expert, columnist and founder of Sexuality Source Inc. She is the author of several books including, “Touch Me There! A Hands-On Guide to Your Orgasmic Hot Spots.”

Sexual activity is on the rise among U.S. teens while the use of contraceptives is sliding in the other direction, according to a study released by the Centers of Disease Control and Prevention.

Findings from the 2007 Youth Risk Behavior Surveillance System show that approximately 48 percent of high school teens say they have had sex, representing 2 percent hike since 2005.

The same survey showed a 2 percent drop-off in the percentage of teens who said they used condoms while having sex.

The CDC questioned 14,041 students in grades nine through 12 in 39 states in the spring of 2007 on a range of risky behaviors, including sexual activity, and drug and alcohol use.