Dear Yvonne,
What are the dangers of oral sex without using a condom?
—Sissie

Dear Sissie,
As discussed in my first book, The Hot Guide to Safer Sex, unprotected oral sex is a high-risk sexual behavior. You can get sexually transmitted infections like gonorrhea, syphilis, chlamydia, or HIV, from performing oral sex on a man or woman. Another thing to keep in mind is that when someone has the common cold sore (a.k.a. oral herpes — HSV-1) and goes down on you, you could contract genital herpes, or HSV-2.

To protect yourself, use a dental dam, which is a rectangular latex barrier that is placed over the vulva (or anus) during cunnilingus (oral sex on a female), or a non-lubricated, non-spermicidal condom during fellatio (oral sex on a male). You can also use a sheet of non-microwavable Saran Wrap if a dental dam is not available, or cut a condom lengthwise for a square.

Dr. Yvonne Kristín Fulbright is a sex educator, relationship expert, columnist and founder of Sexuality Source Inc. She is the author of several books including, “Touch Me There! A Hands-On Guide to Your Orgasmic Hot Spots.”

Dear Yvonne,

I would like to ask my boyfriend to perform more oral sex on me, especially since he likes it when I give it to him. Should I guide him down there or talk to him about it first?

-Clarissa

Dear Clarissa,

Encouraging your boyfriend to kiss you below your navel is one way to clue him into some action farther south. As he works his way down your abs, gently push his head closer to your pelvic area. Allow your breathing and moaning to become faster and more intense. Getting more excited shows him that you’re getting more aroused.

Back up plan: Suggest little kisses on your upper thighs or even on your bum as well. If he doesn’t eventually take a hint and hit the bull’s eye, you can broach cunnilingus by asking him general questions like, “Does it turn you on to think about going down on me?” With questions like this, you’re not making a request, but are feeling him out on the matter. If he has a problem with it, use this as an opportunity to find out what sexual behaviors he is and isn’t comfortable with and why. You can let him know what turns you on and off as well, including that you’re into oral sex. Don’t be shy in letting your desires be known – most guys think it’s hot! Furthermore, if he’s into fellatio, but won’t reciprocate the favor, don’t be afraid to make issue out of it. After all, fair is fair…

 Dr. Yvonne Kristín Fulbright is a sex educator, relationship expert, columnist and founder of Sexuality Source Inc. She is the author of several books including, “Touch Me There! A Hands-On Guide to Your Orgasmic Hot Spots.”