Being a single parent presents the same challenges all parents face but you have two less hands to help. When you are raising a family by yourself you are the one getting lunches ready, giving baths, and driving to and from football practice. You can’t use the good cop/bad cop routine. You don’t ever get a break.  Many single parents work long hours or even work two jobs. You are faced with the financial and time constraints of a two-parent household with one income. Luckily, there are a few simple changes you can make that will help you support your child without adding stress to your already busy life.

Create a “home base”
For your “home base” you will need a calendar, a basket for incoming schoolwork, a spot for backpacks, and space to write. Your home base can be a corner of your kitchen, a side table in your living room, or an office. Announce this spot to your children as the hub of your home and remind them to use it as such. Use a different color pencil for each child’s activities to keep your children’s schedules straight. Encourage your children to keep track of their own activities. Designate a basket where your children can put notices that you need to see and forms you need to sign. Keeping all the forms in one place ensures you don’t miss important information. Keep pencils and pens next to the basket so you can fill out forms immediately and put them right back into your child’s backpack. Your time is valuable, and having a home base keeps you from wasting time searching all over the house for forms, notices, and assignments that need to get sent to school.

Ask for help…and return the favor
Don’t be afraid to ask a neighbor or friend for help. Most moms know that no matter what the circumstance, being a parent requires lots of juggling. Asking a neighbor to drive your child to school in the morning is fine, but be sure to return the favor and drive the kids to the school dance over the weekend. Remember- a simple thank you goes a long way. A bouquet of flowers, a gift card for a coffee shop, or a batch of cookies are inexpensive ways to show you appreciate the support you get and it has not gone unnoticed. A handwritten note to say thanks for the help does the trick, too.

Communicate with the teacher
Let her know what days or times are best for you to meet or to speak on the phone. Give her a time frame in which you intend to return her calls or notes. If you know you work late and don’t always get to her notes right away, let her know she can expect to hear from you within 48 hours. If you have a day off during the week, ask for her consideration when scheduling meetings. Being clear about communication with your child’s school leads to consistent and open interactions.

Prioritize
You can’t be in three places at once so choose the meetings, school events, and games that mean the most to you and your children. Include your children in the process by letting them choose an event they want you to attend. Be honest with your children about why you can’t be at all their events but don’t dwell on it. Refrain from constantly reminding them that you are the only parent helping out- they know this and you should vent to your friends, not your children. When they get home ask specific questions about what happened in the big game or the school play. If you want to volunteer at your child’s school but can’t be there all the time, ask if you can help stuff envelopes or make phone calls and do some of the behind-the-scenes work for events.

Remember that you are one person taking on a huge job and can only do your best each day. Pat yourself on the back for maintaining your children’s safety and security.  Give yourself credit for taking care of all the day-to-day responsibilities by yourself. Enjoy the time you get to spend with your children and stay positive- your children will model your attitude and you can be a happy and productive family together.

Jennifer Cerbasi teaches at a public school for children on the autism spectrum in New Jersey. As a coordinator of Applied Behavioral Analysis programs in the home, she works with parents to create and implement behavioral plans for their children in an environment that fosters both academic and social growth. In addition to her work both in the classroom and at home, she is also a member of the National Association of Special Education Teachers and the Association for Supervision and Curriculum Development.

Children certainly need some rest and relaxation, but summer is a great time to work with your child without the pressure of his or her busy, school-year schedule. Often, parents express a lack of confidence when it comes to their own math skills and in turn, are hesitant to work with their child in this area. These simple tips will help you strengthen your child’s math skills now and throughout the school year.

Early Childhood
*Make math fun! Sorting, counting, and categorizing toys are all simple and fun ways to expose your child to math at an early age. When playing with blocks, identify and sort different colors and shapes. When coloring, ask your child to pass you different numbers of crayons. Find math in every day activities and show your young child how much fun math can be!

*Keep a calendar. Exposing your child to time concepts by utilizing a calendar will support him throughout his life. Identify the days of the week and teach your child to label yesterday, today, and tomorrow. Mark a special event on the calendar and count down the days as it drawers near. Specify when events are happening in relation to his daily routine. For example, “We will go to Grandma’s house after lunch.” Keeping a calendar not only exposes your child to time concepts but helps create structure.

Elementary School
*Check out your local teacher supply store. There are many pre-made materials that you can use at home, such as board games, flash cards, and other manipulatives. Playing a game such as Multiplication Bingo once a week will help your child maintain her multiplication facts in a unique way. Most of these materials are categorized by age so you will easily match the materials with your child’s needs. If you are looking for an inexpensive way to have access to materials teachers use, scan the  store for ideas and see if you can make some of these materials at home. Index cards and markers are an inexpensive alternative to store-bought flashcards.

*Give your child an allowance. Managing money is a math skill your child should learn early. He should learn to save money, become familiar with the cost of items, and make decisions about purchases. After making a purchase, he can count the change and make sure he got the correct amount back. Helping your child become comfortable with money is a skill that will last a life time and make a clear impact on his success as an adult.

Middle School
*Leave your child a to-do list. Word problems are a source of weakness for many children so having your child attend to written language will sharpen her attention to detail and order of directions. Make your lists fun, and even a little silly, by giving directions like “Make your bed. Jump up and down three times. Put your shoes in the closet.” As always, bringing humor into learning will make the experience more enjoyable.

*Review tests and quizzes together. Not all teachers have children correct their errors but you can use this opportunity to look at where the errors occurred and help your child learn from his mistakes. Mistakes, as we all know, are invaluable opportunities for learning.

High School
*Host study sessions. Teenagers often crave independence and establishing their own homework routines is one common source of conflict between them and their parents. Inviting your child’s classmates over for a study session creates a fun way to ensure your child is getting her homework done. It also provides an opportunity for students to “tutor” each other: if one child is unsure of how to solve a problem, another student can explain it. Provide healthy snacks and a good work space and check in on the work session periodically.

*Put your teen to work! Encourage him or her to get a part-time job. Many jobs, such as working in a grocery sore, retail store, or movie theater, offer real life experience with math skills such as making change, monitoring inventory, and discounting sale items. Children this age often begin to ask “When am I going to use this skill in real life?” Applying these skills from an early age is motivating and reinforces that classroom work can be beneficial outside of the classroom.

Another great way to incorporate math skills for children of any age is to get in the kitchen and start cooking! Reading a recipe, measuring ingredients, and timing the completion of your creation are all math skills in action. Your child will be so proud of her work she won’t even realize you just taught a math lesson!

The most important factor for helping your child is to get over your own fear of math. Remember that making mistakes is part of learning and showing your child how to work through a problem is also an essential skill. If you are stuck, consult the textbook, your child’s notes, or contact the teacher and ask for help. Teachers will appreciate you asking for help!

Jennifer Cerbasi teaches at a public school for children on the autism spectrum in New Jersey. As a coordinator of Applied Behavioral Analysis programs in the home, she works with parents to create and implement behavioral plans for their children in an environment that fosters both academic and social growth. In addition to her work both in the classroom and at home, she is also a member of the National Association of Special Education Teachers and the Association for Supervision and Curriculum Development.

Millions of parents across the country face the tough decision of whether or not to place their children in daycare each year. As the number of families with both parents working outside the home has risen, the need for daycare services has increased dramatically. These families may not have relatives that live close by or are able to care for their children. Others families may have a parent that works from home but needs uninterrupted time to complete work. Many daycare centers offer full day versus half day or full week versus partial week options, priced accordingly. This allows each family to match the daycare’s services with their needs.

Daycare, however, is debated among parents, health care providers, and educational professionals. Some support daycare, saying it offers socialization and educational opportunities a child would not have staying at home with a parent or a relative. Others claim those who use daycare services are allowing others to raise their children and have abandoned their responsibilities as a parent. Like any controversial issue, there are arguments for both sides. Here’s a look at the pros and cons of sending your child to daycare.

Pros:
Independence- Children who separate from their parents early and have a positive experience at daycare learn to trust that Mom and Dad will leave but they always come back. In addition, these children become confident in their own skills and thus, more self-reliant.

Socialization- Even with siblings, you can’t match the opportunities for social interaction that a child has at daycare in the home. Your child will be placed in a class with children close in age and have opportunities to play and negotiate with peers each day. Nicole, of Northvale, New Jersey, says she toyed with the idea of keeping her one and 2-year-old home with an in-home caretaker because they had each other to play with. “Even though they are young, I see them argue. I made the right decision-it’s good for them to have time apart and play with other children at day care.”

Academic Advantage- Many daycares provide some form of instruction or exposure to academic concepts. Calendar concepts, time concepts, letters, and numbers are all explored during circle time each morning. Many daycares offer music classes and art projects, exposing your child to a variety of experiences. Your child will learn to follow a schedule and the structure will prepare her for school.

Cons
Increased Exposure to Illness- One parent, Lynn of Harrison, New Jersey, reports her children have come down with more illnesses since they started daycare this past September. Lynn works to provide health benefits for her family of five as well as to supply a second income and time off from her job does not bode well for her paycheck. “My job allots a certain number of sick days for staff and I’ve used all those days and more. Now my pay is being docked every time I call out because one of my kids is sick. I feel like I have to choose between my kids and my job; of course I’m going to choose my kids.” She still worries about her job security because of her absences from work. Lynn also cites seeing other children come in to daycare despite being sick. “Not all parents call out from work and stay home with their kids like I do.”  This leads to the spread and recurrence of illnesses in young children and staff.

Less Quality Time with Parents- Naturally, if you are working during the day, you are going to miss quality time with your child. All parents know, time away from your children cannot be regained. Danielle of Park Ridge, New Jersey, says “There are days my daughter comes home with beautiful art projects and I wish I had been the one to sit and paint it with her.”

Exposure to Poor Behavior- We cannot shield our children forever, but it is certainly discouraging to see children pick up poor habits from peers at daycare. From as early as 18 months, your child may mimic others’ words and actions. If a child at daycare is not speaking nicely to peers and staff, or worse, exhibiting aggressive behaviors such as biting or hitting, your child may see this as a way to gain staff’s attention. Communicate with the staff immediately if you see behaviors in your child that you did not see before daycare. Remember to approach staff as a concerned parent without accusing other children, families, or staff.

Whether you are comfortable with your decision to utilize daycare services or you are still apprehensive, there are a few ways to ensure you choose the right daycare. The best way to choose a daycare is to ask friends for references. Happy children often equal happy parents. If many parents in your community are sending their children to the same daycare facility, put it at the top of your list. Visit each prospective daycare and ask about safety protocol. Ask if there is a nurse on staff and if staff are CPR-certified. Also, ask how children with behavioral difficulties are handled. Whether your child is having a hard time adjusting to the new routine or is witnessing other challenging behaviors, you want to make sure staff approaches these situations with care and concern.

Jennifer Cerbasi teaches at a public school for children on the autism spectrum in New Jersey. As a coordinator of Applied Behavioral Analysis programs in the home, she works with parents to create and implement behavioral plans for their children in an environment that fosters both academic and social growth. In addition to her work both in the classroom and at home, she is also a member of the National Association of Special Education Teachers and the Association for Supervision and Curriculum Development.

This morning as I was leaving the house to come to work at FOX, my 12-year-old son asked me a question that stopped me dead in my tracks.

“Hey dad, is America in a depression?” he said.

And I said “No, why do you ask?”

“Because I hear everybody talking about the economy and all this trouble that I don’t understand,” he said.

“What do you know about the Great Depression of the 1920s,” I asked.

“Well,” he said, “I know there was no money and I think people were jumping out of buildings in New York.”

I tried to reassure him that things were okay and that nobody was jumping out of windows…yet.

But as I left, I started thinking about our conversation, and I asked myself: Why do innocent people suffer? How is all this anxiety and stress over the current economic crisis going to be remembered by the next generation in America?

Yes, every mental health professional will tell us that there are multiple studies that correlate severe financial debt and depression – even suicide.

I remember reading a recent report of two college student that killed themselves after being overwhelmed by credit card debt.

In India, an estimated 150,000 debt-ridden farmers have committed suicide since 1997.

Yes, we all know that suicide is not the solution, but again I asked myself, why do innocent people suffer?

And as I stopped to ponder the answer to my burning question, I began to evaluate some of the things that many of us have forgotten – the things that are truly important.

Love and respect for ourselves and others – that’s what’s important. You can’t buy happiness. The integrity of our lives and the way we love and respect the people we are so fortunate to have in them is far more important than any economic indicator on Wall Street.

So I thought long and hard, and I decided to tell my son the biblical story of Job – a story I think many people should read in these times of financial crisis.

Job was a happy man, a wealthy man who lived a prosperous life filled with family and good fortune. But one day, Job was tested by God. He was stripped of his fortune, his family and his health. Job began to complain of God’s indifference, he wondered why God did not punish the wicked instead of him. But after all of his analysis, he understood that what was important to God was the love that should never be questioned — the love that he has for his children. And, in the end, Job’s prosperity was restored.

Why do innocent people suffer? Because perhaps they forget that love, compassion and respect settles all debt.