Dear Yvonne,
I am a 35-year-old woman. When I was a teenager, I had gotten on top of my boyfriend during sex and was told I was a maniac. Twenty years later and I still won’t get on top. It has been so long now that I don’t know how to get past it in my head. I now want to perform, but my brain will not allow me to feel comfortable. What can I do?  I’m dying to get on top and climax!!
                      – Lizzie

Dear Lizzie,
You should get on top!! Don’t let some comment from a bonehead teen boy deter you from realizing your pleasure potential! Chances are, he meant it as a compliment. Being a maniac in bed is usually construed as a good thing from the male perspective. It means that you’re active, into the moment, enjoying yourself, letting go of your inhibitions and ‘going crazy!’ Wild abandon is a good bedroom addition from time to time, so leave your fears at the door, and saddle up!

Believe it or not, woman-on-top is one of the best positions for ladies. Female dominant sex puts us in charge of our pleasuring, ups the chances of orgasm(s), and makes us the star of the show. Many partners love seeing their lover riding high, and this position results in mutual climax more than any other. Sure, it can be intimidating to get on top, but don’t allow yourself to miss out on another minute of hot girl in charge sex play!

Just be sure to let your partner know how you feel, and ask for your lover’s encouragement and support during your ride. A good lover will be there for you, letting you know that everything is great, everything feels good, and you are all s/he’ll need when you’re in that position. I’m quite certain your high school sweetheart is probably, to this day, drooling over the thought of his hot little temptress, not cowering in disdain. So, get on top – you owe it to yourself!

Dr. Yvonne Kristin Fulbright is a sex educator, relationship expert, columnist and founder of Sexuality Source Inc. She is the author of several books including, “Touch Me There! A Hands-On Guide to Your Orgasmic Hot Spots.”