Dear Dr. Fulbright,
How can I break out of the “Good girls don’t do that” trap and realize that if you never push your boundaries, you’ll keep having the same old sex forever?
— Anonymous

Dear Anonymous,
Most people grow up with a lot of negative messages about sex, for example, they’re told whom to have sex with and under what circumstances. Anything outside of that recipe can be scary, guilt-ridden and wrong. At the same time, it’s titillating because we’re suddenly “bad” if we deviate.

When it comes to sex, the “good girl” versus “bad girl” labels are just that — societal labels. They’re just a negative way of capturing different degrees of one’s willingness to experiment sexually or push the sexual relations envelope. What works for one isn’t going to work for another, and what’s pleasurable for one is going to be a turn off for the next.

So it’s important to realize that we’re all sexually unique and into different things, and it is such a disservice to yourself (and your relationship) to not be at least somewhat open-minded to trying different things or find out what’s best for you. It’s perfectly healthy for people to test their boundaries with different types of sex play and adventures – and to discover what is most sexually gratifying for them. What other people put on you, like the “good girl” message, is a mere reflection of their own issues, attitudes, and discomforts with sexuality. It is not your burden to bear.

Realize, too, that avoiding the sexual rut helps people to experience new sensations, new forms of pleasure, and helps them to maintain monogamy.

Dr. Yvonne Kristín Fulbright is a sex educator, relationship expert, columnist and founder of Sexuality Source Inc. She is the author of several books including, “Touch Me There! A Hands-On Guide to Your Orgasmic Hot Spots.”

Dear Yvonne,
Would you agree that it’s important for women not to worry about the way they look during sex? After all, research shows that a woman’s partner is likely paying attention to her face and body and looking for clues that she’s feeling really good, which makes him feel good, right?
— Charlie

Dear Charlie,
It’s hard for a man to gauge a woman’s sexual responsiveness. So he’s looking to her face for cues that she’s aroused, plus he’s titillating himself in seeing her “sex face” come to life. His ego goes into full gear in loving that he’s helping to make that happen for her — and he thinks it’s one of the hottest looks around. Even if a woman feels silly or is self-conscious about the way she looks, she should rest assured that he thinks she’s super sexy in that state.

Dear Yvonne,
My girlfriend enjoys me giving oral sex, but has to shower before I pleasure her. How can I make her realize she doesn’t have to shower? I understand her wanting to be as fresh as possible, but I don’t mind. I even prefer that she not shower. Any suggestions? Thanks!
—Rob

Dear Rob,
Let your girlfriend know how much you love pleasuring her, and how much you like her in her “au natural” state. As you pleasure her, and then again during after play, express how much you enjoy her taste and smell — how much it turns you on, and more so than shower fresh. Given most females are raised with the idea that their genitals are “dirty,” it may take a while to undo the damage that has been done. Positive reinforcement over time should, however, help your cause.

Do you have a question about sex? If so, foxnewshealth.com wants to hear from you! E-mail your questions to drmanny@foxnews.com

Dr. Yvonne Kristín Fulbright is a sex educator, relationship expert, columnist and founder of Sexuality Source Inc. She is the author of several books including, “Touch Me There! A Hands-On Guide to Your Orgasmic Hot Spots.”